Sure you’ve all heard that Sarah Palin will be resigning as the Governor of Alaska at the end of July.  She will be handing over the task of watching Russia to Lt. Governor Sean Parnell at a picnic in 3 weeks.  Now, given that the announcement comes on the eve of the 4th of July not only is this reason to celebrate even harder, but it is also reason to suspect this is, as Palin says it’s not, “politics as usual.”  Yep, according to the press conference she gave to confirm the speculation, she is doing this for the best interest of all of Alaska AND America.  What a swell patriot she is.

She feels she can accomplish much more outside of politics, but again, I won’t buy into the idea that Palin is leaving political life forever.  I simply think this is her massive ego convincing her that this is a solid move strategically.  How her brain arrived at that conclusion is beyond me.  After all, failing to finish out her first term as governor is a surefire way to make a legitimate run at the presidency–NOT!  But hey, maybe she got an offer to do a reality television show.  Jon and Kate Plus 8 is kaput and its time block is in need of filling.  Todd and Sarah Plus 5 Plus 1 perhaps?

Nevertheless, Palin’s body language during her press conference betrayed her words.  She seemed to be a bit on edge as she rambled on just like the many moments in the 2008 campaign when she felt uncomfortable and unsuccessfully  tried to sound smart and knowledgeable.  Her point guard analogy was bizarre and may have caused hemorrhaging in my brain.  Her complaint against the media and its cruel treatment of her and her family may have been the most legitimate thing she said.  However, she botched that up by citing the coverage of her son, Trig, who has Downs Syndrome.  Why did she botch it by referencing Trig?  Well, because the people who went after Trig are clearly leftist Limbaughs; nothing more than assholes with tiny brains and even smaller dicks.

Why would you make fun of her innocent child, who has Downs Syndrome?  Why would that be your main target in trying to make fun of Palin?  For fuck’s sake, Palin is such an easy target herself that there is absolutely no need to go after her family.  In fact, I kind of feel bad for her family because they have had to endure an unfair amount of scrutiny and belittling when, in reality, the only person deserving of that is Sarah Palin.  Seriously, if you watch the press conference it’s clear that her reference to Trig was nothing more than a ploy to garner support.  I don’t know what’s worse: Leftist Limbaughs making fun of a baby with Downs Syndrome or the mother of that baby using him for her own personal gain.

But she’s gone now–until her next publicity stunt.  When will it come? And in what form?  Beats me, but I do know she can’t compete for the presidency with conservative extremist supporters at her back, and that is reassuring.  Sleep easy, America, the only thing we have to worry about right now is firework accidents and overeating.  Have a good 4th of July and good luck to Lance Armstrong in his quest for his 8th Tour de France victory.

Update:  Well, Palin is officially playing the martyr card.  First, it was her “higher calling” reference in her resignation speech.  Now it’s this: “I said before … ‘You know, politically speaking, if I die, I die. So be it.’”  Wow, she really is trying to ride that wave of Jesus freaks to the White House. The good thing is you can’t win a presidential election when your sole supporters are Jonestownian whack jobs.

You can read more about Palin’s political martydom here.

As for a truly great American, Lance Armstrong is doing surprisingly well in the Tour de France, but it’s early and the mountain stages will be the real test of the 37 year-old cycling phenom.  If you haven’t been able to watch any of the Tour this year then you should go to www.Versus.tv and watch videos if you don’t have the Versus channel.

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And if you’re interested, here is part of Sarah “The Martyr” Palin’s press conference (you can view the full press conference here):