Microwavable Snack or Snack of Death?

Described by comedian Jim Gaffigan as “Diarrhea Pockets”, Nestle’s Hot Pockets has been a cultural icon in the United States far more than you probably know. Almost every person has heard the Jim Gaffigan big on “Hot Pockets”, but many of us haven’t realized the impact this microwavable meal has on our lives.

Let’s take a closer look at the social history of these micro-snacks, their varying definitions and the birth of terms like Hot Pocket Syndrome and Alabama Hot Pocket:

Hot Pockets were invented a pair of Iranian-American brothers by the name of Paul and David Merage back in the 1970s! It took them 13 years before they were able to produce and sell Hot Pockets for a profit. They started the company Chef America Inc. but by 2002, the brothers sold their company to Nestle for $2.6 billion. Although Hot Pockets were only available in the United States, now they are being sold all over the world in countries such as France, Spain, the UK, and Germany. They are also being sold in Canada as part of the Stouffer’s lines.

There are well over 20 different varieties of Hot Pockets, which include meals for both breakfast and lunch/dinner, and to add to the variety, they also make Hot Pockets with a croissant crust, Pot Pie Express, Hot Pockets Pizza Minis, Hot Pockets Subs, Calzones and now the newest, the Hot Pockets Panini. They even have a choice for those that are trying to be more health conscious with their Lean Pockets.

So we all by now basically know about the Hot Pocket, but how has it become a pop culture icon? Let me explain.

If the various Hot Pockets TV ads that ran starring a creepy Asian, wasn’t enough, comedians use Hot Pockets as material for their bits. Jim Gaffigan isn’t the only comic to reference Hot Pockets in their routines. Larry the Cable Guy has used a routine similar to Gaffigan relating to the after effects of eating a Hot Pocket. Ellen DeGeneres: Here and Now, funny woman and daytime talk show host has said, “I blame the microwave for most of our problems. anything that gets that hot without fire, that’s the devil. you don’t believe me? you put a Hot Pocket in there and 3-4 minutes, pop that thing in your mouth, if that’s not hell, ladies and gentleman, I don’t know what is.”

The words “Hot Pockets” have also translated to several different types of meanings in our society.

According to Urban Dictionary, there are several definitions of “Hot Pockets”

1. Hot Pockets - A term used amongst skate boarders or the “extreme” sportsman, meaning the burning and often painful sensation when jumping or falling and landing on your heels. It usually tends to hurt in your lower back and heels. “Eh yo dude, you know when I was jumping over the fence? I just suffered some harsh hot pockets.”

2. Hot Pockets - When someone gets so obese that “hot pockets,” or patches of fat, form on their lower back. The person becomes so plump that these two spots on the back become taught rolls that look like hot pockets - the food. “I finally got hot pockets, I guess I’m ready for Gastric Bypass Surgery now!”

3. Hot Pockets - The term used to identify individuals with any one of a number of venereal diseases. “Marcy went to the clinic, and before she even saw the doctor, everyone knew she had hot pockets.”

There are also variations of the words Hot Pockets such as:

1. Hot Pocket Syndrome - during pregnancy, a woman’s vaginal temperature increases, and on some days it’s extreme. if you have sex with said pregant woman on one of those extreme days, its like inserting your penis into a hot pocket just out of the microwave. which, at first, may SOUND awesome, and is…until afterwards, then you’re just a hurting machine for a good day or two. “My pregnant wife and I fucked last night, and now I have hot pocket syndrome.”

2. Hot Pocketing - An alternative form of the slang term “hot boxing,” in which someone smokes marijuana in a car to increase the longevity of the high. “I need to get hella faded, let’s go hot pocketing.”

3. Alabama Hot Pocket - The act of putting icy-hot, Ben Gay, etc, on one’s condom before intercourse. This is usually used as a revenge move or as a practical joke. An excellent way to end one’s relationship. “Bitch doesn’t think i know she cheated on me; think ill give her an Alabama Hot Pocket and then dump her ass.”

Lastly, do a search on YouTube and you will find thousands of videos related to the food. And if its on YouTube, It has to be a cultural icon, right?